Do you, like me, get depressed at this time every year when the time changes and darkness comes earlier? My birthday is also at this time of the year, which gives me mixed feelings about it.
Yesterday I met up with a friend for lunch in North Beach. We probably haven’t seen each other since last fall, though used to get together often enough. Since the partial lockdown, he’s stayed mainly in his neighborhood, the Sunset, barely going out to eat or meet up with anyone. It’s been making him both stressed and depressed. I asked him why he didn’t go out to other neighborhoods sooner. He’s very concerned about possibly catching the virus, though. It’s certainly taken its toll on him. He looked older, with more gray hair and out of sorts. It’s good to take precautions, but don’t be overzealous to the detriment of your mental health! He was SOO happy to see me and thanked me a few times for coming out; I was quite surprised.
Truth be told, I’m largely stress-free these days. Retirement has made me calmer. Walking dogs whenever I feel like it has added little to no stress to my life. Quite the contrary, starting my days off by spending time with man’s best friend truly has a positive effect on me.
On the other hand, I DO understand depression. I’ve not been immune to having depressing periods myself during this 7, now 8, month long partial lockdown. My roommates have both gone to spend time with their families and/or girlfriends. I’ve basically been in the apartment by myself the entire time. Being alone can make you find creative things to do – watch every historical docuseries possible on Netflix, sing karaoke to the chagrin of your neighbors, attempt to learn to play the ukulele (also to the chagrin of your neighbors), play rudimentary songs on your keyboard over and over (and hide from your neighbors), attempt to do all of the crossword puzzles in your big book of crossword puzzles, bake banana bread, learn something/anything by watching YouTube videos, practice foreign languages with language apps, etc. Then again, all that time alone makes one think… and think… and think… I think about my regrets and what I could have/should have done differently in the past. I drink too many dirty martinis and stay up late listening to sad songs. I watch chick flicks and cry. Generally, however, the really bad periods don’t last more than 2-3 days in a row.
My most recent one week trip helped immensely. I felt brand new going out in the world and meeting new people. I still wore my mask, except for photos shoots, eating and drinking. I still kept my distance from others as much as possible. And yet, I felt so much freedom walking around in a city that I didn’t live in, taking photos, eating at new restaurants, listening to socially distanced live music, checking out art exhibits and so forth.
As for my friend, he doesn’t feel comfortable to travel anywhere. In that case, he should decide to explore a different neighborhood every week. It’s kind of like a staycation. You go somewhere you’re not totally familiar with, have a few new/different experiences and go home when you’re ready.
I’m slightly depressed at the moment, but won’t let myself listen to those sad songs or watch sad movies. I’m going to create a new cocktail, try out a new recipe, get out that crossword puzzle book again and buy some more flowers!
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